#4GoalsTo40 – I started 307 days go! 693 more days until my 40th birthday!
90 days of consistency – I started 77 days ago and we have 13 more days.
This morning I listened to some lives from December 12th, 2022 and January 1st, 2023
I quickly jotted down some journal questions:
What commitments if any did you make back in December of 2022?
What’s the update?
December 12th of 2022 on live and in front of my daughter. I promised to role model and show Janelle that we could do anything and not to be scared.
I’ve been doing it scared ever since
I also reminded myself of how blessed we are to have access to so much free knowledge.
January 1st, 2023 – I made big goals, I was bold and confident on live, talking about…just a lot. I quickly learned that I cannot give what I do not have.
I’m so proud because I set those big goals 307 days ago and they have not changed, but baby the journey has!
I’m proud to be Your Favorite Healthy Hustling Momager!
The mom behind the dream of Don’t Be Jelly – Subscribe to the dream full time – www.dontbejellyllc.com
I’ve started writing about how important it is to pour into yourself before you pour into others. I connect it to the same message you hear on the airplane. You are to put your oxygen on FIRST and then you help your family and everyone else.
When the flight attendant is talking, in my mind, I can always see a mom thinking she could quickly give her child oxygen and then help herself. I can see her getting it done, but not having enough energy left to fix her own oxygen. BOOM! Supermom ran out of super powers, but her child is alive and now motherless.
It’s the same thing we do in life. We pour, pour, and pour more! Then we wonder why we are sad, crying, stressed, and out of ideas. We wonder why we don’t like what we see in the mirror or recognize who we’ve become.
As I continue to learn myself and heal, which is a forever journey, I often reflect. I started to break down how many parts of myself I like to give away and what it takes to refill those areas.
Refill to pour again when you hear it or see it from me, is how I talk to myself and how I would talk to a friend.
I decided a long time ago, that something from within had to change if I wanted to continue to be the woman I see in my dreams.
I knew that I was feeling empty and could not find the joy I thought I would have forever. I knew that I had to figure out what refueled my joy. I didn’t know that I didn’t know how!
Refill to pour again is me sharing my self-talk and commitment to live, learn, grow, glow, and love out loud. Our testimonies are someone’s survival guide.
Just like on the plane, we have to give ourselves oxygen first and only then can we begin to help those around us.
Refill to pour again, we can’t pour from an empty cup
Give yourself the same love and compassion you give the world.
I have been working on my mind as a first priority for quite a while and now that I have added a new version of consistency, I am seeing results.
The results are nothing like what I expected, but very much what I need. I know that to be true.
Today – I am still processing my feelings, it’s not even 8am so I have already told myself to relax, stick to the plan, and I’m sure you will figure it out.
When I have convinced myself that I don’t like the way I feel or my energy is off. I stop blaming others and I read my most recent behavioral index. If I feel beat up, I read my positives first, if I want to kick my butt into gear, I read my opportunities first.
Then I address my health and ask:
What do you need?
What do you want?
If I can’t clearly answer those or if I feel myself getting overwhelmed or worked up. I start to journal through the question of:
How did we get here?
I review my call logs, I reflect on the prior days, I reflect on the food I had, I reflect on my rest, I look over what got my yes vs my no, and I spill the beans on anything I can think of.
My age continues to change, but sometimes I have to handle myself like a child. Paris have you ate and slept? Paris do you feel good?
Paris…gurlllaaaa go to sleep! It’s funny but we really aren’t ourselves if were, tired, hungry, or sick. Give yourself grace, I am, and I am already feeling more like my dreamy self.
Today, feels like one of those days where I need to remind myself that we don’t want too many “I don’t feel like it” ‘s as the reason we don’t do things.
Today, I didn’t feel like getting up at my early time, but I know I will feel even worse if I skip my morning routine. The lesson repeats until learned.
It’s ok to adjust, don’t quit.
It’s You vs You
For example, today instead of listening to my morning podcast on my walk, I did it from my bed and opened my window.
I like to hear and feel the new day. I should be getting my body moving, but it’s asking for rest today. I compromised with myself.
It’s ok to adjust, don’t quit.
It’s You vs You
I also needed to complete a video that I did not want to complete. Why? In my mind I decided that it was a waste of time and would not get the result that I want, but do I know that to be true? No!
I went ahead and did that this morning. It’s due tomorrow, I committed to completing it, and waiting until tomorrow was not going to make it more exciting.
It’s You vs You
I almost skipped this virtual journal entry to get back in the bed before truly needing to start the day, but then I decided that I could at least start the entry. Now I am so thankful and proud that I went ahead and kept typing. I already feel lighter and if I would have went back to sleep, I would have woke up with an undone morning to-do list, and a mind full of feelings waiting to be processed.
You are not yourself when you are tired
You are not yourself when you are hungry
You are not yourself when you are not healthy
It’s You vs You
When you don’t feel like the you , you want to be…. Spend more time with you
We want to be honest with ourselves and face our true feelings, but what if we mixed it up?
The question would bring me so much sadness on some days that I started to start with the positive and then move into the other feelings
It was like a positive charge to get me ready to face my fears and decide if they were real or not
Today – I am thankful for the calm spirit I have
I am thankful for my determination
I am thankful that I have more questions than worry
I am thankful that I feel energized to “figure it out” versus being paralyzed by my thoughts
Today- I am patient with myself and looking inward for guidance
Whenever I feel like my efforts aren’t producing the way I think they should, I slow down and reflect.
I pull myself out of the weeds and make sure that I am aligned to the desires of my heart.
How?
Quiet time
Journal Time
Listening to my daughter talk often kicks me into gear because I am always motivated. I am either ready to pour into her more or learn from her unique thoughts.
I wake up in thanks every day, before I look at anything, and then I look at my bank account.
I remind myself of the priorities for the day.
I take note of how I feel and I dream about how I’ll wake up feeling as I continue to accomplish more dreams. A major key to success for me is being able to wake up early and have my morning routine.
Recently, my Crohn’s Disease made resting a priority and waking up the same time as my child does not set us up for success. My mind needs time to ease into the day.
Every day, I listen to at minimum 4 podcasts that add value to the accomplishment of my dreams. Balance – none are boring and feed me in multiple ways!
When my Crohn’s Disease is not taking the front seat, I walk at least an hour every morning and do some type of workout video.
I journal
I meditate
I dream full time
On what I consider my best days – the day is counted a success on the productivity scale before I wake Janelle up at 6:15 am.
#4goalsto40 – It’s been 300 days of consistency working on my goals before turning 40. Shout out to my sunflower, Dominique!
Health & Finances are number one because if my health is right, my mind is right, and my money is right
Don’t Be Jelly operating as a profitable business (money goal is set) with connection to the #parentsbehindthedreams community
Become a Doula I can be proud of
Launch a new program for my 40th
80 days of consistency feels like 8 days and 80 days! I can’t believe it’s already been 80 days, but the self – critic feels like you should have done this forever ago and I’m behind. I also feel like I had to remind myself of my why every day. I had expectations for this to be easier after 30 days.
I work on refilling my self- love cup daily!
What’s exciting is I have so much more to do and even though it was not easy to show up every day, I can’t stop now.
Today’s thought: Is everything you’re doing connected to something?
Do a time analysis on yourself
Time and activity- what got your yes and what got your no? Include the who as well.
How are you documenting the progress? We are determining the best way to measure the mission.
How are you?
Answer as though you are talking to yourself.
I’ll start: I’m hopeful and reminding myself that I am improving every day. Success does not depend on me doing the most every day. My health is my wealth and I’m winning every day that I don’t quit.
I’m dripping greatness on myself every day, just like a leaky anything. If the drips continue consistently, you’ll eventually have a lot of water to deal with.
This time my water won’t cause damage. I’m dreaming bigger every day and it shows.
69 days of consistency with intention made me the most uncomfortable I’ve been behind myself, in my entire life.
It’s wild because I recognize the feeling. The feeling was all throughout my 13 years in corporate America. A friend and I found joy staying at the office all night. We knew it wasn’t getting us ahead, but we would not be drowning during the day. We would laugh at how overwhelmed the “others” have to be because they could not stay at the office like us.
This was pre – Janelle days. Our peers had families, relationships, and drama to dela with. I was running from my personal grief and he was dedicated to self. I had to tell my work bestie I was pregnant over tequila. I cried at the doctor finding out I was pregnant because my baby was floating in tequila! I was depressed for the first 6 months but we will tell that story another day.
Janelle was the first baby my work bestie had ever held. I continue to say it, I do not recommend growing up in corporate America..whewww the damage. The title of my book its: What I wish my leader knew(Release date unknown).
Today! 21 days left! I am here to remind you and myself that the mission is measurable. Write that ish out! #bragsisbrag – How have you shown up for yourself recently?
I started with an overwhelming amount of expectations for this 90 days. I still laugh at myself daily when I overdo it with the “to-do list”. I narrowed it down to 3 major goals, well I thought they would be easy, and that was still too much. I’m improving every day on being realistic with my capacity.
For the last 69 days, I’ve showed up and asked myself how I could improve.
I’ve reflected daily for 69 days and I have executed with intention for 69 days.
I have documented the process for 69 days.
I have positively impacted my future for 69 days.
I have shown up for Paris in new ways for 69 days.r
I believe in myself more and more every day.
I am committed to learning out loud.
I am committed to living out loud.
I am committed to growing, glowing, and loving out oud.
My testimony is someone’s survival guide. I promised to be dramatic for the rest of my life in the best ways. #LLFATMAC
Some weeks I feel every day, but joy comes when the tension starts to release. The storm clouds start to break!
Then I remind myself of how I slowed down, worked the happy list*, doubled down on inner work, self-care, and extra self -love.
I slowed down, I didn’t stop.
This morning, I can feel the re-fill happening. You have to refill to pour again, just like on the airplane. Give yourself oxygen FIRST!
A new joy letting me know that I learned the lesson and it’s not repeating.
We know days “like this” will come
Weeks might take us through longer journeys, but we make it
We keep showing up for ourselves and our dreams
What was weird for me this week, was learning that I really had never been this uncomfortable before. It was new territory, but all I needed was my tools and resources. Everything I need is inside of me. I surprise myself every day in some of the most dreamy ways.
A new day, but we are sticking to the same plan of growth. The journey of harmony includes pain and peace.
Fri-yays hit so different these days. It’s something about being able to be in control of your schedule. The wknds for me are longer than week days, but they are practice for my dream life. Filled with lessons from dreaming bigger for myself.
Your Favorite Healthy Hustling Momager
*Happy List- A list of things that make you happy. It could be calling someone that will make you laugh, shopping, self-care in any form. You continue to do things on the list until you feel better. Make sure we keep the list healthy.
Now that the question (“How are you?”) doesn’t make me jump, it’s started to force me into new uncomfortable zones.
Feelings…ohhhh so many! Healing in real time is an amazing opportunity, but man it’s tough! You know better and not doing better essentially means you’re quitting on yourself. I decided today, that I could add some context to that and give myself an extra shot of grace.
The good thing, is I know what to do when days like this come. The lesson repeats until learned, so I recognize the vibes.
Increase your “me time” when any form of doubt starts to creep in. Paris! You know the drill! Did you learn the lesson or not?
Refill your self-love cup. I looked back over the last 66 days and bihhhhhhhhh! Paris you are doing a great job. Look at what you’ve learned! Look at what you’ve overcome! Look at how much you trust yourself!
You slowed down like you know you should! You didn’t stop!
How are you? Uncomfortable and determined.
I’m thankful for grace! Another day! Another chance! Consistency looks amazing on me. Another day to show up for me and my dreams.
You favorite Healthy Hustling Momager 